Okay, last night I took a break from writing and went down stairs to check on my wife. She was watching this movie, The Bible- Solomon. Trying to be as polite as I could, (maybe dumb also) I asked her what she was doing. (Yep, that really was a dumb question now that I look back on it). She said nothing.
She was in an all out trance with the television. So, I was like, that’s cool. I started looking at the movie with her. Then I noticed Vivica A. Fox was in the movie and she really had Solomon sprung. So I jokingly made that infamous comment “once you go black you never come back.” Then I swore I felt the earth shake right up from under me.
The wife erupted, “I don’t even know why she thought she was so special when he had 700 other women he so called loved!” I was like, “WHAT?” I couldn’t believe the guy had that many wives, but I was like, that’s cool. To each his own. But then I made the cardinal mistake a lot of men tend to make at some point in their lives by defending a dude that we don’t even know.
I actually had the nerve to give a reason as to why Solomon had so many women. And in Solomon’s defense I said, “Well, out of all those 700 women Solomon was married to, maybe she was the one.” That’s when dead silence broke out again and my wife looked at me so hard I believed she slapped me right upside my head in her mind.
She said, “Please, if there were no laws in this country all men would be married to 700 women just like Solomon was.” And there I went again, this time defending a whole bunch of dudes I didn’t even know. (Sometimes we just don’t learn)
I said, “Well, I think if you asked one hundred men that have been married for at least five years, eighty of them would say they’d keep just one wife, while only twenty men would would attempt to take on trying to deal with 700 wives at one time.
Silence prevailed again as the earth shook even harder this time and she said, “You sound stupid! Seven hundred women is a man’s dream.” Foolishness made me want to say something else, but wisdom kept my mouth shut.
Now needless to say, the following morning I brought the situation to the attention of a friend of mine. Ending the story with a chatter, I said “And she said I sounded stupid” He looked at me and said, “I don’t know man, I think I’ll take the seven hundred wives.”
Once again, Foolishness made me want to say something, but wisdom kept my mouth shut.
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